I shall hold on,

till there is nothing left to hold on to.

Realism

No matter how hard you plan, if it's not yours, then it's not. I've learnt this countless times before. How many more similar lessons are there? I'm tired. I hope there aren't anymore, because they are draining, very draining indeed. Energy. Hope. Drive. Optimism.

If only I could reach out and grasp the solution without affecting anyone around me. If only things weren't that complicated. If only I had the means. If only I knew in advance what would happen in future so that I need not writhe in making painstaking indecisive decisions. If only things would turn out to be the way they were suppose to be.

it's the second day of august. already. too fast to be true i reckon. the last 2 months felt like a dream, a brisk dream that i would wake up from on the 21st this month. i wonder whether has anyone ever thought that they were living a real life but wake up one day only to find that everything he thought was real life was actually just a really long dream. it'd be pretty zha-dao.

but anyway, it's soon to depart again. in approximately less than 3 weeks, i'd be in another part of the world, living a completely different life, having an entirely new set of friends, speaking a language that i seldom use. i get pretty fearful of what is yet to come when i think about all these shortcomings, erm no i meant, challenges. Yes, challenges would be a more appropriate (and positive) term. hurdles that don't kill you will only make you stronger right? besides, overcoming challenges is an intergral part of emotional and mental growth aye? okay, it seems that this girl is trying to give herself a lil bit of self encouragement to survive through this path of thorny journey. but hey, you can't blame a girl of being fearful of going to a completely foreign place to live life anew okay... show some mercy!

i guess the most painful part would be departing canada. i'll miss my family and friends here dearly, i'll miss the life here. i wonder if canada ever be a part of my future. would i ever come back and live here, or would i be in hong kong for the next thirty years? or perhaps the states? hummm...*thinking with all available brain juice*

ah forget about it! the drastic changes i've been through within the last half a year has taught me to live in the present, to appreciate what i have now, and to not plan too far ahead, cause honestly, how far can you plan? you never know what will happen tomorrow, or one month later for that matter.

but honestly, i can't help but wonder. okay i'm self-contradicting here.

anyhow, done with all the glum and confused feelings of mine *rolls up emotions and shoves it into the closet*

okay here are some random pictures taken here just to brighten up this post.

So HOT!!!

haha...okay i know the last time i posted something here was in February. i guess i flatered in keeping updated AGAIN. sigh... i'm so not blogger quality.

but anyway... i'm here to rant about weather here. if you're thinking about the chill often regarded together with canada, you're wrong. it's been so HOT lately!!! it's like low 30's but literally feels like 40's. serious. it's gets even worse in the shop i've been working in the past month. there's no air conditioner, no ventilation! which explains my indulgence in high-in-fat-high-in-calorie ice-cream treats lately. who's says people grow fat only in winter? i say it's the same senario now and then!

that said, besides the sweltering heat now, weather's here been pretty nice =)

I'm back!

Yes! The title tells it all!

I know it's been not long ago that I had one (rather abandoned!) blog that was subsequently deleted. The truth is...keeping a blog constantly updated, and the constantly here meaning once a fortnight, is seriously arduous! The first few weeks of blogging were okay. But then after that, I tend to tell myself tomorrow...tomorrow...tomorrow... Ah, procrastination.

Well, this time, i hope that this unruly habit of mine will not beleaguer my blog once again. Wish me luck!!!